Joke for 30-03-08

DOCTOR MEETING

A group of psychiatrists were attending a convention. Four of them decided to leave, and walked out together. One said to the other three, "People are always coming to us with their guilt and fears, but we have no one that we can go to when we have problems." The others agreed.


Then one said, "Since we are all professionals, why don't we take some time right now to hear each other out?"


The other three agreed.


The first then confessed, "I have an uncontrollable desire to kill my patients."


The second psychiatrist said, "I love expensive things and so I find ways to cheat my patients out of their money whenever I can so I can buy the things I want."


The third followed with, "I'm involved with selling drugs and often get my patients to sell them for me."


The fourth psychiatrist then confessed, "I know I'm not supposed to, but no matter how hard I try, I can't keep a secret..."

Guys are Tagged

Today i was smsing my friend and I was telling her that must watch Race because 1 of my favourite actress is acting...namely Katrina Kaif haha!

My friend said that we boys only thing about 1 thing and went to add on that the movie had many sexual scenes.Although its true that guys do like pretty girls and often "fall" for them.Its not always about the physical love.

Its like guys are tagged...if you know what i mean.
I was wondering what did 'we' do to be tagged like this

What is Love?

Joke for 28-03-08

COMPUTER NOOBS!!!!

Computer novices may feel like they're alone these days, but some of the following calls to IBM's help center show there are plenty of people out there who still are inching onto the information superhighway.


After a caller gave a technician her PC's serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, "I see you have an Aptiva" desktop unit. Before he could say another word, the caller shrieked and said she'd be right back. When the customer returned, the technician asked if she was all right. The caller responded: "Had I realized you could see me, I never would have telephoned in my bathrobe."


A customer who had just received a laptop computer asked about the power-saving feature known as "hibernate." Would this hibernate device work in the spring and summer, the caller asked.


Another caller explained she had received a gift of software on 5.25-inch diskettes, but she had only a 3.5-inch disk drive on her computer. The technician said she had two options: Get a second disk drive, or use 3.5-inch diskettes. The customer called back later, now complaining that her disk drive was making a terrible noise. And this despite the fact that she was using a 3.5-inch diskette, she said. After a bunch of questions, the technician determined the caller had used a pair of scissors to trim the 5.25-inch diskettes to fit the 3.5-inch drive.


A caller, perplexed that his new desktop computer--the one that was supposed to do everything short of bringing on world peace - was doing nothing, cried out for help. No problem, the IBM technician said. First, open a "window" to launch a specific program. The conversation continued, and the caller asked a few moments later if it might be all right to close the window. Why, the IBM technician asked. Because, the caller responded, it was getting very chilly.

After months......

Cant recall the last time i went gym...ages ago
Anyways did my weights again and WOW i could feel how much i had slacked off...haha!

After gym...i tried doing handstand to show my friends....they took pics of it and the best photo is in my friendster...
Oh god my body going to ache like hell tmr.......

Thats all folks......

Joke for 27-03-80

TALKING DOG!!

A man and his dog walk into a bar. The man proclaims, "I'll bet you a round of drinks that my dog can talk."


Bartender: "Yeah! Sure...go ahead."


Man: "What covers a house?"


Dog: "Roof!"


Man: "How does sandpaper feel?"


Dog: "Rough!"


Man: "Who was the greatest ball player of all time?"


Dog: "Ruth!"


Man: "Pay up. I told you he could talk."


The bartender, annoyed at this point, throws both of them out the door. Sitting on the sidewalk, the dog looks at the guy and says, "or is the greatest player Mantle?"

3 moves in 1 day!!

Today was super fun.After recess we(Ben Shaun & Me) had free periods all the way till school ended.WEEEE!!!

Anyways during that time Ben taught me shoulder freeze and handstand and i showed Ben my handstand and he said it was good.WOW Ben u r a great teacher.thanks man

Watch out ah...i becoming as good as u ah...haha!!

Joke for 26-03-08

This is a test for a kid in LA cool huh.....


City of Los Angeles

High School Math Proficiency Exam



Name:____________________

Gang:________________________



1. Duane has an AK47 with a 30 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive by shootings can he attempt before he has to reload?


2. If Jose has two ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8 ball to Jackson for $320 and 2 grams to Billy for $85 per gram, what is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?


3. Rufus is pimping for three girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his $800 per day crack habit?


4. Jarome wants to cut his 1/2 pound of Heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need?


5. Willie gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy and $100 for a 4x4. If he has stolen 2 BMW's and 3 4x4's, how many Chevy's will he have to steal to make $800?


6. Raoul is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his common law wife is spending $100 per month, how much money will he have left when he gets out of prison and how many years will he get for killing her since she spent his money?


7. If the average spray paint can covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray with 3 cans of paint?


8. Hector knocked up six girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in the gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Hector knocked up?

Today

Today was fun i guess

We(hockey team) had won the National's School Competition and there4 the entire school got half day.
After school i went to get my hair re-cut....dont ask long story...haha!
After that i went home to sleep(Dont know why but now days i cant seem to sleep on time or properly)

Today got no tuition also...WEEE

Anyways now i am going to start posting jokes on my blog also.

Holi

Yesterday We(Ash Kumaran Satish Roshan Ravi both the Rohit's )played holi until we were super tired.

I wore black jeans and a totally white shirt there and came back in god knows what colour i came back with.The field was super muddy beacuse it had just rained before holi.

Anyways We had a good time playing colours....I think this is the oonly year i enjoy other colours apart from black haha!

I had a fun time dancing and puting colours on ALL my friends.

Ben's Bday

Today we(Ben Darren Shaun & me) celebrated Ben's Birthday by playing Lan and having dinner at my mom's shop

We had prata with egg and onions.We were planning to go for a movie but Ben had to go back by 9.
So Darren Shaun and Me went to Vivo to walk around and do some window shopping. I brought a cool reflective screen protector.

Then we went to see hamsters and puppies.But sadly the puppies went to sleep already.
We then made our way to the ADIDAS shop(my most favourite shop in Vivo)to play table soccer with other people

Shaun is really good at table soccer...i had a hard time defending his attacks..haha!
Darren was standing close by playing his psp......i think he is partly sad and angry at the fact that Ben could not be with us.

Sadly we didnt take any pictures...sorry guys!

4th Place

Yesterday we played in the semi finals.Although we came in forth i feel we did our best and hope that we will improve together as a team and do better in the next competition.

Kumaram said that he will start training from now...haha
We would have done allot better but Satish and Kumaran were tackled very hard and Satish was injured very badly.He could not put his weight on both his legs.Kumaran was also tripped.The team that was the worse was Nike Underdogs.They tackled not for the ball but to injure the other players.

Anyways I feel that we had the coolest looking jerseys and although we came in forth we will still be getting a Nike jersey and boots.

By the way,Ravi's team won first place.haha!Next year will will make it.Lets hope so.For pictures pls go to my friendster

New Jersey

Yesterday we (Kumaran,Ash,Satish and me) went to make our team jerseys.I hope it looks good,its a totally black jersey with gold wordings.

I think we got a very good deal because i think we paid $38 for pants and shirt with the printing included.

I am so excited,tomorrow we are collecting it.Can't wait to see what it looks like

Oh yea,Thanks Kumaran for telling me the loss and win thing,If u had not taken the picture we would not have believed u haha!!!

UNLUCKY 13

Woah! Today was great,we played soccer till we could not feel our legs anymore.
We had a team of 7(Ash,Ashnee,Kumaran,Satish,Shaun,Donald and ME!)
We named ourselves UNLUCKY 13...it was my idea haha!

Anyways we lost the first game but played well after that,in all we won 3 games lost 2 games and draw 1 game.Satish and Kumaran were playing forwards dam well and Donald was playing keeper and I was playing defender all the way,Shaun Ash and Ashnee were switching among themselves.

In our "Pitch 3" of the "CAGE" there were 4 teams(Adidas,Aljuned,and some other team that i cant remember the name right now and of course Unlucky 13)

We played well and had a good game with all the other teams and made many new friends,EXCEPT for adidas team.There was this loser who kept pushing me against the wall very hard.I tolerated his crap for a very long time, until i finally got mad and asked him if he wanted to die.He acted very big in front of his friends by speakibg back to me.

After the match Kumaran and Ash were trying to cool me down haha! so I put that crap aside and continued playing the other matchs.

HAHA!! I was the one who scored the winning goal to bring our team into the semi finals(my goal was super lucky,I just put my leg forward,all the credit goes to Satish who made a beautiful pass by lopping the ball, all i did was put my leg infront =_=.Ohh yea Kumaran scored the most goals Donald was the man of the match and ALL this is partly beacuse of Ash because Ash made the team. Oh yea Kumaran was our CAPTAIN haha!!!

After the game we went to KFC where i saw that loser who pushed me into the wall and right away my blood started boilling.Kumaran was stopping me but Ash said let me go,so i went to the boy and told him to eat his food and come outside.I could have wacked him up,if it was not for my friends who settled it by talking.Thanks guys,now that i am more cool, i am thankfull that i didnt do a stupid thing like wacking that loser.

Thanks Guys for all the fun...cant wait for next sunday...I am soo confident we will go all the way if we play like how we played today

UNLUCK 13 FOREVER!!!!! haha

My day

Today was a 'GREAT' day for me.My friend ,Darren,got my shirt lace confiscated by our Ex maths teacher.But i didn't go down alone,I told the teacher that he was also wearing lace.Then we both told the teacher about Ben's lace.Its a rule,1 for all and all for 1.

Besides that,today we had Saints a flame.It was fun,we sat in the air-con hall for like 1 hour plus.Today i had to go for a hockey game,but i lost my wallet.It had like $80 in it,my link card.IC and my ezLuckily Darren called my and told me he found it in his bag,so i told him to come to my house. Thanks man.